TWFC

A fortnight ago Koonal was promised back to basics football. Rodney Marsh is quoted as once saying that much of English football is "played on grey days...". Tonight was grey and wet with a large puddle of water at the car park end. It was slippery underfoot and only the floodlights pierced the drizzling atmospheric gloom. Koonal and Rodney Marsh had both correctly predicted this evening of football.

For the first time since these reports began the fixture also saw the introduction of substitutes.

The Muftis included Yaseen and Adnan both of whom had played before and were eager to join in again. The teams were pretty evenly matched until the Bibs edged ahead 4 - 3. The Muftis had gambled on putting out a side with two spectators who were possibly a fraction of a yard faster than some of our fastest players and possibly younger than most of the players who normally grace the fixture. These Young Ones were like having two Raheem Sterlings running at the opposition. The Bibs however were undaunted and worked off of their innate knowledge of each others game built upon hours of playing together over several months. This cohesion told and the Bibs absorbed the myriad of step overs and tricks from their opponents and moved further and further ahead.

Friends of the spectators on the pitch expressed an expectation that they should play too, one even came on to the pitch in high dudgeon and had to be told 'thanks but no thanks'. This resulted in an under current of discussion between those on and those off of the pitch. Undeterred the Bibs continued banging the goals in. At 11 - 6 to the Bibs Scott extended the kind offer of mixing up the sides. Like Avvon before him on 20 August Niyi politely declined the charitable offer. The way of the warrior is to accept triumph and defeat and treat those two imposters the same.

While any hope of victory was seemingly being thrown away, in order to make peace the Young Ones agreed substitutions amongst themselves. Yaseen was replaced by Zac and Adnan by Mo. The main strategy for the Muftis seemed to be to closely man mark Ben and Jon in order to stop the Bibs pressing them back in their own final third. By trying to win the midfield battles this meant they could then feed Avvon who acted as the Muftis' front man.

With the match entering its last 15 or so minutes the Bibs were 12 - 7 up and Steve was acting as the final line of defence regularly repelling Muftis' attacks. The Bibs, who were cruelly unable to benefit from any substitutes of their own, were on the verge of a truly remarkable victory. Suddenly shaken from his discussions with his colleague through the fence Zac went on a mazy run and scored a solo goal to make it 12 - 8. The score was a little more respectable and the chant from the Muftis became 'we need four goals!'. The Young Ones combined with Milo and scored again and the chant was 'we need three goals!' and so it went like a footballing sword of Damocles, the decrementing difference in goals hung over the Bibs until suddenly it was 12 - 12. Similar to Leicester v Man U in September within a blink of an eye the Bibs were actually behind.

In a last gasp attempt to restore the balance Steve advised everyone that it was virtually time and the last goal would win. With momentum on their side the Muftis pressed an attack through the middle then laid the ball off to Avvon who Chris Waddle like was out on the right. The angle was such that there was very little on for him. Those who regularly read these reports know that Avvon strikes a football from the wings like a Ronnie O'Sullivan object ball into the corner pocket in snooker. Even the Young Ones stopped in awe as Avvon teed himself up and rifled the ball into the far corner to effectively win the last goal shoot out for the Muftis.

Match Awarded to the Muftis 14 - 12.

Things to Note

The last few weeks have shown that the concept of a lone spectator is fast becoming a misnomer. The spectators now seem to grow geometrically as one becomes two and two becomes four. When dealing with the hugely talented Young Ones it is useful to remember that each one has got friends. I feel a song by Shalamar coming on

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRT8AcPPfCk .