TWFC

Payers on 21-03-2018
andyhibbert       Subscription £5.00
Austin                Subscription £5.00
dabiyani1995    Subscription £2.50
Eddie01            Subscription £1.50
JakeFlowers     Subscription £3.00
Milo                   Subscription £3.00
Niyi                   Subscription £5.00

Players
Orange Bibs

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anthonyto, Austin, Ben, dabiyani1995, Eddie01, Jermaine, JonF (second half)

Yellow Bibs

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andyhibbert, JakeFlowers, JonF (first half), MarkA, Milo, Niyi, VIIGeorgeVII

We welcomed Anthonyto back for what is believed to be his first match since early December 2017. Also the ground controller informed us the fixture would end at 9pm prompt at which point the floodlights would be flashed and then turned off. Apparently this was a necessary step because of the actions of the next team who turn up after us.

The match was really close early on with the Orange Bibs holding their own despite having one man less. Let's say for argument's sake that the score was 2 - 2. It should have been about 7 - 2 to the Yellow Bibs but Anthonyto was performing goalkeeping miracles and pulling off save after save.

OK you cannot legislate for a keeper who is singlehandedly keeping the opposition out. Fair enough. Now imagine how Jose Mourinho would have looked at his team if they had a man extra, could not park the bus and also did not score. Yes you've got it.

Image of Jose Mourinho when not impressed

Ever a gentleman Andyhibbert does not loudly express his frustration but you can normally tell when his guard drops and you see the Mourinho look of absolute incredulity at what his team are doing.

Mahatma Ghandi is widely reported to have made the statement "...be the change that you want to see..." . He may not have used those exact words, indeed he may have expressed it much more eloquently and in more detail, but for the purposes of the match Andy was told to be that change he wanted to see.

Andy took the challenge and assisted by Milo he began scoring a Bale - Kane - Salah style hat-trick proving to everyone that Anthonyto could be beaten. I say assisted by Milo. Well Milo did not just simply assist, this evening he seemed to be at the centre of a first half demolition of the Orange Bibs. Milo seemed to be involved in everything that went down the middle and right flank, unpicking the Orange defence and laying the ball off to strikers to score. There was only one way to describe what we saw it was midfield munificence. He became 'Milo the Munificent'. You see we do use our Sunday best words in some matches.

Whilst this was going on at around 7 - 4 to the Yellow Bibs the ball hit Jermaine's arm and a handball was called against him. Technically he did not have the time to move out of the way. Players heard a frustrated Jermaine ask whether it would please people if he cut his arm off in future. Clearly we would not advise such extreme measures to any player; but it is noted that standing with ones hands in ones pockets makes it difficult to move ones arms out of the way properly.

Anyway half-time, 8 - 4 to the Yellow Bibs and it was agreed that a player would swap sides. JonF switched to the Orange Bibs for the final 20 minutes.

Having lost the mighty JonF and being only four goals ahead it seemed a difficult ask for the Yellow Bibs. VIIGeorgeVII (he of the enhanced orange boots) sat back in defence talking the Yellow Bibs through how to keep wave after wave of Orange Bibs at bay. We haven't seen such a technical master class in defence management since the last time Barkball played.

The Orange Bibs crafted two goals to bring the score to 8 - 6. Milo tracked back in defence then inexplicably reached out to handle a shot the keeper had covered. A different kind of munificence one might say. Jermaine cheered up a bit as a handball was awarded against an opposition player.

The ground controller arrived at the gate to tell us time was nearly up. Still 8 - 6 to the Yellow Bibs. The lights flashed, the match was over. Someone from the Orange Bibs rocketed the ball and hit the cross bar. It was such a mighty shot that it must have been Austin, Ben or Eddie01. The ball ricocheted back off of the bar. As the lights went out Dabiyani1995 smashed the ball on the half volley into the net. After the match a Dubious Goals Panel chaired by MarkA ruled that whilst the match was actually over Dabiyani1995 could have the goal. The logic being that the action did not affect the final winners and to be fair anyone who can blast a reaction half volley back into the net with the last kick of any match deserves the goal.

Final Score Orange Bibs 7 - 8 Yellow Bibs

Match awarded to the Yellow Bibs

Let's do it all again this week at Tottenham Wednesday FC