TWFC

There was no immediate way of delineating the teams by tops this evening as everyone except Nathan was in a dark top. In a moment of true inspiration it was noticed that evenly matched teams fell nicely into those in shorts against those in bottoms or long/three quarter shorts. So tonight the teams were Longs v Shorts.

Longs carved out a 2 - 0 lead while the Shorts were finding their rhythm. Statistically we have found that, between evenly matched teams, being 2 - 0 up without consolidating it is probably one of the most misleading positions to be in. It seems to promote a false sense of security that a committed opponent later exploits. However, there are also 'lies, damn lies and statistics' so tonight we'll see what became of a 2 - 0 lead.

The early forays included a peach of a goal from Steve.

The ball was either navy blue or black and playing under flood lights at night with everyone in mainly dark colours it did seem to at times blend in with its environment. As the Longs contemplated change of keeper the Shorts hit a decent, low pace, grass cutter shot from distance and a scientific paradox occurred. The ball literally disappeared en route to the goal and reappeared in front of the keeper before going in. 2 - 1.

The teams swapped a brace of goals thereafter with the Shorts scoring again from distance reinforcing that there might have been something about the car park end lighting and the dark ball. That said it could just as easily have been two excellent well controlled strikes from Marty and Nathan, it all depends on perspective.

At around 3 - 2 to the Longs Tim struck the ball into the gardens at the back, this is where legends have it that a malevolent ghost dog prowls. In something reminiscent of a Harry Potter scene Tim ran through the gate into the dark of the trees and disappeared. He could not be seen but reassuringly his disembodied voice was heard to answer a plaintive 'No!' to periodic questions asking whether he had 'found it?'. To compound the magic of Tim and the Enchanted Garden,after a few minutes, having been searching for an old dark ball, he re-emerged triumphantly with what looked like a brand new fully pumped up white ball. It was almost as if a remorseful canine poltergeist had gifted it to us to make up for years of alleged torment.

Game on with a new ball. Both teams scored, and spurned opportunities, until the score was four all then 5 - 5. The posts and bar took a healthy battering as shots skimmed off of them. As the match wore on the Shorts edged into a lead. At one point Arik was one on one with Steve and while Steve narrowed the angle Arik slipped the ball to the keeper's left and it flashed towards the upright. Complete silence ensued as the teams awaited a decision. The third official bottled it, Jon eventually yelled 'good save' and the game continued.

The Longs were unable to reduce the deficit but the Shorts did score again. Following a thrilling end to end encounter, in which the keepers distinguished themselves, the match finally ended with one of the lowest scores of the year.

Match awarded to the Shorts 7 - 5.

Things to Note

At the end of the match Steve quietly mentioned that Arik's shot probably went in. To compound things a large gaping hole was observed in the side of the net at the car park end. Following the confession, and on the balance of probabilities, Arik therefore joins Danny in experiencing a controversially disallowed possible 'goal'.

There is no dubious decisions panel in our football. We have no action replay or goal line technology so players agreed that, though some might say it was really 8 - 5 to the Shorts, the official record will stand at 7 - 5.

The Men from MAMA have not lost a single match since joining/re-joining the fixture.

When we next meet the World Cup draw will have been made. Going home late one Wednesday on the 149 bus I had a vision - it said put your money on England being in Brazil's group, leading to a four or five goal thriller in the opening match next year and eventually England progress to the semi finals...