TWFC

We had not had enough players to field teams for the previous two weeks. We could not risk a hat-trick of absences. We did not want to be the generation that lost the 8pm Wednesday slot, which the club has held consistently for over two decades.

Nine members signed to play come what may. We thank the following guests: Elvis's brother Alex, Loyal Fan Bonney (who often comes to watch for the sheer love of the game) and the Legend of Liban who plays in the fixture before us and sometimes stays on to help our fixture.

With nine members and three guests the St George's day match was on.

The players had footballs but to the discombobulation of some there were no bibs. Solution led to the ultimate team. The Three Musketeers (Jimmy9, Leonalexis and Mash10, whom we know have played football together since they were lads) were placed alongside their mate Guest Bonney. These players were then given carte blanche to select any two other players to join their team. They chose Elvis and his brother Guest Alex. The ordained six were called Musketeers and the remaining players were called Mufti.

Guest Liban could not join the Mufti for the first few minutes so a friend of his kindly stepped in to cover him and went in goal. The Musketeers took advantage of their better familiarity with each other. Soon the score was

Musketeers 2 - 0 Mufti.

When Guest Liban entered the fray, the Mufti settled into a shape of himself, Ellislewis123, Naz, Sadulla and VIIGeorgeVII playing outfield and Niyi in goal. This would be the shape that the Mufti played for the rest of the match. The Mufti players started to hold and press and pass the ball to each other from flank to flank in the club's classic big pitch formation. This paid dividends and brought them level with the Musketeers, then edged them ahead.

Guest Alex was able to clinically score a third for the Musketeers but their goal at the other end was relentlessly pressured. Guest Bonney was by far the busier keeper and had to pull off a number of commendable saves. Despite the hard work of Guest Bonney, the Musketeers were very much under the cosh.

There were two close calls for the Musketeers as they attempted to score. We had no VAR or referee so went back to the, old school, method of consensus opinion. In the first case Mash10 was denied a headed goal for being in the area. The keeper did not attempt a save as he claimed Mash10 had strayed into his penalty area to head the ball. Popular opinion was that Mash10 was in the area. He declared himself to be uncertain of his position as he had concentrated on the ball. The goal was chalked off.

A similar discussion took place when Jimmy9 lost his marker from a free kick and ghosted in to turn the ball into the net past a disbelieving Mufti keeper. On this occasion the attacker was adamant that he had not strayed into the penalty area. He was able to also convince at least one opponent of his innocence and the majority decision swung his way to give the Musketeers their fourth goal.

Early on in the match Guest Bonney had committed the keeper's nightmare of playing the ball outside of his area. Given it was his debut and we have esoteric rules the infringement was forgiven and the Musketeers were simply told to buck up their ideas and actually tell their guest the rules.

Later on in the match Guest Bonney inadvertently played a ball outside of his area for a second time. This time the Mufti could not overlook it and a penalty was awarded. Naz, one of the most accomplished strikers at the club, put the ball on the spot and with steely determination positioned himself. Guest Bonney remained resolute. To onlookers it was like watching Bukayo Saka against Amadou Onana. Naz hit the ball hard and true down the centre of the goal. Guest Bonney did not move and smothered the ball to instantly project himself into club folklore as a keeper who saved a penalty on his debut appearance.

The match wore on, Ellislewis123, Sadulla and VIIGeorgeVII settled into the metronomic play of passing the ball between themselves. They continuously owned the midfield, building up attacks with Naz and Guest Liban safe in the knowledge that the Musketeers were so far behind that they had to come at them and could not sit back.

The quality St George's Day fixture was totally lit up when Sadulla, from just outside the left corner of his own penalty area, picked a perfect diagonal pass up pitch. He played the ball to Guest Liban who was on the other side of the pitch with his back to the right of the opposition's goal as the Mufti looked at it. The ball Sadulla played was so accurate that if Guest Liban had been holding a bag the ball would have dropped into it. Guest Liban was not holding a bag so he did the better thing on the pitch. With his back to goal, he executed a swivelling, cork screw, scissor kick volley over his right shoulder to rocket the ball into the net past a disbelieving keeper. Teammates and opponents alike stopped to spontaneously clap the prowess of Guest Liban's finish.

The match was aptly summarised by Ellislewis123 later on social media as follows:

'Naz motm the little magician, pushed the attacks forward and vital interceptions in defence and great goals, Liban had a good partnership with the little magician contributed well and a wonder goal created by Farhads great vision and pass. Good team effort. We must not forget the opposition did well to take the early lead and caused us some problems, well played to them'.

Player of the Match is awarded to Naz. Goal of the Game was awarded for Guest Liban's wonder strike from Sadulla's pinpoint quality cross pitch assist. There was no camera so we cannot award a match ball.

Final Score

Musketeers 4 - 11 Mufti

Match awarded to the Mufti.

Things to Note

The club is seeking a goalkeeper. Guest Bonney should be invited back for further trials on camera so that selectors can take a view on his full potential between the sticks.

Let's do it all again next match at Tottenham Wednesday FC.